Wednesday morning

Good morning all, I have a sofa bed, at last, the boys put it all together yesterday and it looks fine and makes a big king sized bed when open. Now all I need is some willing visitors to test drive it.  The lounge is still in chaos but now that the bits are off the floor I can get in and do some cleaning and furniture rearranging. In years gone by what would have taken my a couple of hours seems to take at least a week.  I think with age I have just become slower and get tired more quickly.

I had a really ropey night last night I got so hot I had to open my door and this morning it is 10 degrees before the sun is up.  Shiona is coming over today so she is going to give me a hand with the lounge and I thought we would have a German lunch of bratwurst with braised cabbage and mashed potatoes.  I am trapped in the house this morning waiting for a meat delivery and fortunately, the freezer is fairly run down ready to receive all the Christmas goodies.  My mind is a million miles away planning holidays and the new utility room.  I have been researching silly things like a rack for brooms and long handled things.  Drying racks for clothing and some means of hanging the ironing board.  If I get this right it could be a real asset to my life.  It should all be done before the spring so I will be able to devote more time to the garden next year.  Currently, there is a lot of stuff in the garage which I want to keep like large kitchen equipment but I have a plan for that and will gradually start moving the stuff to the far end shed where it can sit and wait until the garage is gutted. I don't want my mincer ending up in the skip.  Under the stairs is full of rubbish much of which can be thrown but lots of stuff can go to the utility room once it is done.  I have been toying with the idea of commercial kitchen wracking but things will just get dusty so I think a few cupboards will be in order so I can also keep the overflow from the kitchen.  So much to think about!!!!  Then once that is all done I will have to recarpet the dining room and then I am off on holiday.  What a turn around in my life from abject misery to bubbling over with happiness.  The antidepressants are a thing of the past and I feel fine. It just goes to show that they were needed at the time of maximum stress and now the stress has gone they are no longer needed.  My GP will not be surprised as he knows I would sensibly reduce the dose until I am clear.  He is very obedient and does just what I ask as I think he trusts me to know what is right for me.  Anyway, suffice to say if you find yourself at the bottom of a dark hole get help and tell your friends so they can help you.

I have finally finished the course on a life of happiness and fulfilment and it has been a great help in getting things into perspective and I am trying to put all I have learned into action. Did you know that letting your mind wander can be a bad thing and make you unhappy as the mind tends to think of negative things when left to its own devices? There is plenty of scientific evidence to back this up.  

At the moment I am filling a diary and before I go to sleep I have to think of three things which made me happy that day and take a moment to examine why they made me happy.  Even some negative things turn out to have positive outcomes.

Now I am moving on to conflict resolution  and a course on animal welfare.  I had better look at brushing up my Italian as well.  So much to do and so little time......  I have learned one thing in life and that is that the more you learn the more you realise you know nothing.  I love the internet as there is just so much stuff you can get hold of and so many videos to show you how to do things. and on that happy note, I am off for a shower then to braise some cabbage!!!!!  Have a good one all and I hope you can see some of the old Diane reappearing from the depths.  

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